Why do I run?

I notice there is something wrong with me. I tend to run away from things when I have them. I admit it's a problem. I know people had enough of me running but they still kept quiet. I know I felt it too. I just cant stand doing so. I wanna make a confession to all of you. The first thing I'll say is I ran away from my friends. Everytime you guys ajak me go out or do something I always have the habit of saying " Cannot why so last minute?!!" " Huh so far?? Dun wan la" " Cannot la something has come up. Have fun anyways" Familiar right. I know. The main reason is because of my parents. Eveytime when I wanna go out they tend to fight. Its always noisy when I wanna go out. Resulting my mood is spoiled the whole day. I'm not afraid to tell you that I have a very serious phobia.. Worse than butterflies... Its the noise and scene of my parents fighting. Many of you dont understand I'm glad many wont. You dont wanna be in that position. So because of that It's the main reason that I cant go out. I cant go anywhere without supervision and to make things worse I cant do anything bout it. I almost came to a brink of depression but not willing to give in. I believe that I dont have it. Out of curiosity I went and "google" the symptoms of depression. The symptoms matched. I wasnt surprised. I kept denying it. And still is. Another thing is the fact when I had to leave early and out of the blue or in the middle of something. I had to if not I cant go out as much anymore. I felt like being caged. Its cause of a phycological thing which sticks to me... I sorry guys... I really am. I dont think you guys will understand but I really want you guys to.

..house arrest