I'm kinda sorta maybe happy???!!!

I havent felt like this for a long time now. I developed a feeling towards you and I, at always have to take control of myself. I really like you but I cant go further. You're not what I thought I'll be falling for cause you're not like any other as I've seen. You're special and this quality that you have is extremely rare. I'll say yes if you want to but currently I cant. I'm not that type of girl. Be true to yourself and be true to others. I dont wanna cheat my way to your heart. Not again. I dont want this to happen. I know. I paid my price. It seems that I'm rather afraid that this year would end. I wonder what will it be like the next? Will it be happier? Will it be more exciting? I seriously dont know. I'm glad what I prayed for came true. You got what you wanted. Something which makes you happy. To tell you honestly, every time I pray and wish for something is that you'll be happy even I'm not there. Live a happy life and just be the person who I know you are. Congratulations you archived it. I will always remember you as if it had left something in my heart. Times like these are the most beautiful and times like these are the most heartbreaking. I have times which I had broken down and I had times I built myself up. This is your time... Good luck..

...mr. ?, prayers, and an old friend.